Today

Shush, beauty, we can worry on the morrow's turn.
Tonight, let us dream! Let us dance and love
And carry on gaily. Let us love and let us be--
For we can consider heavy things after the long night.

For now I ask for happiness and light kisses.
I can understand your worry, but I beg,
Toss it away and find me in its place. Worry
Will do nothing for us in the end--after I have gone.

Some will cry over a loss that has not yet occurred,
But you and I still have each other and time!
Why cry now? Why live for a bleak future? Instead,
Love me today and miss me when I've gone from this sphere.

I love still. I want still. I live still...
Do not seek to change these facts by dreading my sure demise.
It will come, dear, and I will miss you terribly, but
For now... I'm here. Use this time for love, not worry.

--C.R.E.

Us

The day broke long ago,
But we haven't had
The time to fix it yet.
It's you and I now...
But I never imagined
That we would find such
Beauty in one another.
I love the unexpected,
Grin at surprises,
And laugh at the thought of us.
So, you being here
After the night has ended...
Well, it brings a smile
To my face and a laugh
To my heart.
This must surely be what love is.

--C.R.E.

Steal Away With Me From This Human Race

Take my hand and follow me to that place--
Where birds sing, the sun shines, and lovers cheer.
Steal away with me from this human race.

Let me once more make a grin light your face--
Yes, a joyous smile from ear to ear!
Take my hand and follow me to that place.

The world is full of lies and such disgrace
So let us sail from this dark and cold pier,
Steal away with me from this human race.

I know the feelings that man can erase...
Oh love, I beg, let go of all your fear,
Take my hand and follow me to that place.

In Mankind's world, you are as frail as lace,
And yes, I worry for your safety here.
Steal away with me from this human race.

And as we sojourn in beauteous grace,
We will know safety from the Demons' leer.
Take my hand and follow me to that place--
Steal away with me from this human race.

--C.R.E.

Self-Loathing

Fragile, grim, ghostly, ethereal...
I am certainly not wholly who I once was.
My once rotund smile has become gaunt
And tangled up. It no longer fires right,
Flashes passersby, or gleams with love.
Alas, I fear it is broken beyond
What I as a meek and lowly man could do
To repair its once glorious state.
And my eyes!
Oh, my poor, dull eyes. Once,
They lit up at a mere mention of mischief--
Or you--
But now, they turn downward and dazzle none,
Holding all of their gleam selfishly back.
What has happened to my once-tender words?
Are they forever cursed to be cold and uncaring?
Apathy? I knew not the meaning of the word!
And now, it has come to define my presence.
Fragile, indeed! Broken. Wispy.
Dying.
I am but a shell of my former self...
And I blame it entirely upon
What I allowed myself to leave behind,
And who I let myself become.

--C.R.E.

A Long Love

I am forced
To wonder after you
Almost daily, you know.
There is something to
The way you hold your eyes...
Some kind of a glow.
I find it entrancing,
Unfair, and adorable.
Please, my angelic consort...
Won't you respond to
My simple romancing?
I suppose it may not
Be in the stars
For you and I.
But hoping brings forth
Vast and new power...
Please come to--and stay by--
My side.

--C.R.E.

Tears

Looking back on times gone by,
I find myself with tears to cry...
So many things I wished I'd done,
So many songs I've left unsung.
And then I come to times with you--
The best of times, through and through--
And tears spring up again, you see,
But tears of joy at thoughts of you and me.
I still wish for times with you, my dear...
But know that those are nowhere near.
We've gone our ways and now are parted--
And it would be impossible for us to be restarted.

--C.R.E.

Adulthood

Splash...
It covered us then,
The glorious mud.
And we were happy.

But later--much later--
We avoided it as
If it were some
Plague-ridden thing
That sought to sully us
For sullying's sake alone.

What is it that
We do to the
Innocence of youth?
The things we once found
To be all that mattered
Now turn our stomachs
And make us blanch.

Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
We stood in the rain then
But now hide indoors
As the heavens cry.

Oh that we could return
To those simpler
And kinder times.
Alas...
Here we are:
Adults.

--C.R.E.

Your Memory

Would you smile and laugh with me once more?
Or is that far too much for me to ask for?
You are weak now, passing on from this sphere...
I'll miss you, dear... Oh that you could stay here!

You're lying there now, fading faster and faster,
Soon, I fear, you will return to The Master
And leave me alone in a way I've never known.
Stay with me, love! I cannot go it alone.

I couldn't cry when you gave up the ghost.
Though I wanted to fill an ocean from coast to coast,
I found no tears in my sad, dead eyes...
And they couldn't look away from where you lied.

Beyond all reason I released weeks after,
Tears flowing freely down my face, mocking laughter
That we once shared and smiles you gave me.
Though sad and lonely... I love your memory.

--C.R.E.

Used Up

I am
A plastic bag
Blowing in the wind.
Once I had
A goal and
A great purpose...
But now,
Having served my
Use, I have been
Carelessly tossed
Aside by those
Who once I helped.
I go now, useless,
Used up, empty,
And somber.
What have I become?

--C.R.E.

5. Unbreakable

5. Unbreakable

Everything Is All Right With Me

All could fall apart at the seams...
I’d still be wearing a smile.
Winter could come straight from spring,
I could be made to walk many miles...
Everything is all right with me.

Maybe you’ll say that I’m past caring—
It’s unhealthy, you’d cry, it’s wrong.
But here I am, I think it’s sort of daring
The way I simply keep trucking along.
Everything is all right with me.

Heartache—what’s that? Should I care?
Should I mourn? Pain? No way!
I’ll live with a full heart and the wind in my hair.
And what about life? Do you hide away?
Everything is all right with me.

I’ve lived many different ways, you know.
And through it all, all I’ve found is this—
Be you high on life or struck down low,
A silver lining is pure and simple bliss.
So, everything is all right with me.

—C.R.E.

A Simple Request

The dawn broke long ago,
But you’re still here by my side.
Promise me one simple thing;
Never take your leave of me.

I’ve been in places much like this
With other lovers and friends,
But all are gone and have disappointed.
Will you love me still tomorrow?

You feel so right to me--so beautiful
And pure--indeed, everything that
I had ever come close to dreaming of.
But others, too, have felt similar to this.

Change my pattern, dearest.
That’s all I ask.

--C.R.E.

Heart

Heart

I don't understand my heart anymore...
For still it yearns for impossible dreams.
After all this time, it's her I adore--
But she wishes little to do with me.

I'm in agony--dear, dear agony of mind--
For she found him and he, her...
And I fear that they will cross the line
That, with me, she could not endure.

He stands where I once stood,
But stands better than I ever could.
But still, my heart longs after her...
And will forever, I'm almost sure.

--C.R.E.

Lying In Wait

The past:
Happiness,
Regrets,
You and I...
Lovers.

The present:
Hopes,
Dreams,
Preparation,
You and I...
Friends.

The future:
Blurry,
Ethereal,
Unreal,
Hopeful...
You?

--C.R.E.

84. Echoes

84. Echoes

When you asked me if I could hold
To those memories—the things
We said, what we felt, and the
Heartfelt promises that we made—
I had to fight back a laugh.

The truth is, darling, I never stopped
Looking over my shoulder at
Those special times—looking
And hoping that they might
One day come true again.

The Echo of us calls sweetly to me,
But is laced with regret and derision.
It cries, “Hope for us again one day,
You silly soul, and know that we
Have little chance at what we had.
My days are now filled with other
Lovers and possibilities... Why
Would I ever return to your arms?”

Why do you ask this thing of me?
And why do I feel so hurt over it?
It must surely mean that you too
Hope for a future us, right?
However...

Insecurity is whispering another tale
Into my too-readily accepting ear.
“She simply wishes a back-up,
Friend—an endless love... Just in case.”

Which is it?
And, a better question,
Do I truly wish to know?

—C.R.E.

4. Rivalry

4. Rivalry

I'd fight him if I thought
That I could win you by
Sheer will alone.

Honestly, I love you more
Than he could ever understand--
But I suppose that that never
Really matters in the end.

You care for him, I guess...
Though, to me, he speaks
Far too freely about important
And heavy things.

Sure, I love you,
But I never said a word to you
About the deepness of my heart.
And here he is--early on he spoke
Of love and marriage and more...

While his heart was in so many
Different and unknown places...
Mine was focused on you.

And now, he has your eyes,
Your mind, and your affection...
What is this cruel and mean thing
That has become existence?

Surely this rivalry is a joke--
It should never have been a match.

--C.R.E. 

A Magnificent Life

She always held her head up high
When she spoke.
And it made us take notice,
We listened to her like our
Lives depended on her next word.

She led us into battles and treaties,
Bound our wounds and sent us off
To do what we thought was best--
Even when she knew better.

She taught us in such ways.
And now, when I see her
Barely able to lift that
Once-proud chin, her speech weak,
Her limbs diseased...
I can scarcely speak for fear of breaking.

How do I repay a mother at the end
Of her magnificent life?
I know not a word or phrase...
I have nothing that she could possibly
Take with her into that far-off realm.

How does a son repay a life?

--C.R.E.

Glass

My heart seems to be encased in glass--
With a simple note attached:
"You have the hammer, dearest...
Please break in case of emergency."

For that is what I seem to be to you...
Just a safety, just a back-up,
Just a plan for when things go south
With old whats-his-name.

Do I even matter to you?
You mean the world to me--
And, did I own it, I would give it gladly
For you and what you are to me.

My heart seems to be encased in glass--
No outside force can affect it
For good, evil, or some other unknown power.
But you, dearest, are not outside of my heart.

--C.R.E.

You

You're sort of like filling
An empty room with loved ones.
They warm it with their words
And make a person feel better.

I'm sort of like feeling alone
In that selfsame room.
No one gets it, no one can see
That they aren't really helping.

But we're sort of like two-halves
To a beautiful and complex whole.
For when we are in that room together,
I know that I am understood, loved, and happy.

You, to me, are bright days,
Sweet words, and happy thoughts.

--C.R.E.

If Only

I'd tear down mountains for you...
If I could,
Or breathe out stars for you to view...
If you would.
I'd take the color from your amber eyes...
Would you let me,
And make you something sweet to prize...
If we could only be.

But alas, alas... We are but
Passing souls on this road of life.
Destined to walk in different ruts,
And cause each others' hearts strife.

Oh how I envy the stars and moon,
For they never part--not now nor soon.

--C.R.E.

Pressure

Ugh. Horrid computer day. It just was on the fritz. I FINALLY got it working. So... In my defense, this poem was written according to the rules, just not posted due to technical difficulties.

Pressure

It built until it threatened
To break us apart. It tore
At our weakest seams
And forced our life-force
From our mean vessels.
It came to us where we lived,
Where we laughed, where
We spent our days loving...
And it turned us around.

—C.R.E.

I remember

Yes, another. I... Needed to today.

I remember
Nights spent in the rain,
Holding you close
And whispering happy thoughts
And grandiose ideas
Into your innocent
And accepting ears.
You ate them up,
I remember.
I remember days.
Days I spent laughing—
You could always make
Me smile then.
There was something about
The way you looked
At me... the way you held
Me in some high regard.
I remember it all.
I remember tears.
They fell from your perfect face
In streamlets, pooling at
Your feet and separating
Us from one another.
I remember the distance.
I remember hands and knees
And crawling back to you,
Begging for another chance.
I remember ruining that one, too.
I remember you, my love...
Do you remember me?
Please say you do.

—C.R.E.

Early Grapes

In our haste to taste the sweet flesh,
We started the harvest weeks early.
At first, we found soft and simple grapes,
Easy to pluck from the vine and eat.

Soon, some of our party found a hunger--
Insatiable, no matter the number of the grapes they ate.
They ate and ate, and soon, could no longer
Taste or enjoy their early bounty. They passed
On to different paths and we saw them no more.

Another group discarded their bounty,
Opting to wait for the time of harvest
And its real and truly satisfying fruits.
They too, left us behind, but stayed on
The horizon, beckoning us to follow.

But I took up the early-grapes, entranced by their taste...
They were the sweetest that I had ever known.
Soon, my stomach soured to them, while my mouth
Lusted after the succulent and happy taste.

In order to save my stomach, I left the early-grapes
And followed after those wise souls who waited
For the true and glorious harvest--
Whose grapes, I found, were sweeter by far
Than the early-grapes of days gone by.

--C.R.E.

Truth Be Told

Truth be told, darling,
You're always on my mind.
Morning, noon, night...
I can't end your onslaught.
But, truth be told,
I wouldn't want to anymore.

We may never be--I know...
But just feeling like this
Is a reward in itself.
After all, it was a wise person
Who said, "The quickest route
To a heavy heart is to let
True love go unnamed."

So, truth be told,
I love you dearly.

--C.R.E.

86. Picking up the Pieces

86. Picking up the Pieces

Goodbye.
You went out of my life
Like a wind through the trees—
Scarcely seen, but strongly felt.

Where to next?
Where do I go from here?
You were everything to me—
Or, everything that mattered.

I’ll be fine.
The more I say it,
The more I believe it myself.
The words are nothing more
Than the tales we tell children.

I still love you.
I don’t know that I even know
How to make myself stop...
Or that I would want to.

Goodbye.
I’ll be here if you ever feel the need
To come back and pay your respects
To the pieces you’ve broken me into—
Pieces that I’m still trying to pick up.

—C.R.E.

75. Shadows

75. Shadows

They’re lurking in the circles beneath my eyes...
Waiting for a chance to jump at my happy thoughts
And shred them into dark dreamings—indeed,
Mere shadows of their true and glorious forms.

They call to me from the formless night, saying
“Little boy, turn this way, and bend that way!
Become one with us and ours, and we will show you
The truth of horror—and how to master it.”

Leave me be, dark demons of shadow!
Let me feel the light of the sun once more,
Let me hold onto the fluffy and happy thoughts
And be free of thee and thy dark natures!

Alas, the world is heavy in my heart....
And I, being merely mortal, can do nothing on my own.

—C.R.E.

Goal

He could see the marker in the distance--
The one sure sign he had taken the right path.
His eye unyielding stayed his course,
But his feet would sometimes stray from right.

Ultimately, he passed before he reached his goal...
But angels carried his legacy on.
With help from one on high, he came upon the marker,
Took it for his own, and laid down a new one for others to follow.

--C.R.E.

Gone

Reason hasn't stopped staring at me
Since the day I left you alone.
Nor has logic stopped crying in outrage
Saying, "Foolish boy! You had
The sweeter things of the world
And you left them for what? Ease?
Some perverse sense of joy? For shame."
Could I go back and change the things I've done...
Would I? I'd like to think so.
But I suppose only God knows that answer.

--C.R.E.

Fallen

I am a lowly, lowly demon...
A being fallen far from grace.

A grace which I once knew far too well.

What lead me down this path of death?
Pride, lusts, man, and complacency.

I have but one goal now, you know.

I will turn as many souls to my will as I can...
For misery, little one, loves company.

--C.R.E.

Mastery

I long to find a place
Where every creed or race
Would take responsibility
For every step-- triumph or folly.

We walk along life's slick slope,
Nary feeling a glimmer of hope
But often feeling slighted and grim--
All because of mortal sins.

Mastery is all I seek,
A thing owned freely by the meek
But longed for by the proud of heart--
The simple question: Where to start?

The only solution in sight:
No matter the darkness of the night,
Hold to truth, love, and right...
And you'll never be far from the light.

--C.R.E.

35. Forgotten

35. Forgotten

An Ode to Your Memory

You are like a scarce-remembered dream...
The details of which are long gone,
Replaced by mere impressions of the truth.
When you left, why didn’t you come back?

Times with you are the books we read as children:
Plots and characters are all but forgotten,
Settings have not withstood the ravage of time,
But we remember snatches of scenes—
Powerful moments that grew to define us.

Where did you run off to?
Why have you left us here alone—
Never again to feel thy warm soul on our hearts?
I am left only with a small memory—
A veritable shade of the true you.

A boisterous laugh filled with the cheer of years past,
The scent of travel that you always seemed to carry...
Is this all that is left of your once-proud self?
Will we meet again? And, if we do, will I know you?
Or will you be all but forgotten?

—C.R.E.

52. Stirring of the Wind

52. Stirring of the Wind

It fills us up full,
The stirring of the wind—
Which in turn stirs up
Our hearts, minds, and souls.
It enlivens us as it changes
All it touches for the better.

In the stirring of the wind we find
A reason to move on;
Indeed, reasons to change, start fresh...
Reasons that had eluded us
Until nature found it proper to intervene.

After the change has been incited,
What may we become?
Will we rebuild our old path,
Or start anew, from the dust?

One thing is for sure:
Our lives will never be the same
After the stirring of the wind.

—C.R.E.

26. Forever and a Day

26. Forever and a day

Dearest love,
I have recently found that
I am at my most content and comfortable
When you are in my arms.

Indeed, when your saccharine scent
Fills my nose and makes
My awareness questionable, at best,
I know that I am right where I belong.

Skin to skin, hand in hand...
What could be better than being near you
At any given moment?
Being near you every given moment.

Forever could never be long enough
Where you and I are concerned.

—C.R.E.